"I don't know what's possible."

OSM_OS_Keyvisual-Spectrum_DIN_A0_landscape.jpg

When I ask someone why they have come to me for voice therapy, so often the response is, “I don’t know what’s possible.”  Well, guess what?  Neither do I.

What I do know is that change is possible.  A word of warning:  It’s important that possibilities not become expectations.  Possibilities give you a beacon of direction of travel. Expectations imply a destination which may not ever be reached, despite a long journey.

I also know that there are factors that impact upon how quickly or easily change is made.  For me, these factors fall into two categories:  Tangible and Intangible.  Every person has their own set of both types to consider and every person’s response to these factors will affect what’s possible for them.

Tangible factors are simply advantages/limitations and your priorities.  

1.     What do you have to work with?  A person who wishes to feminise their voice will be at a natural advantage if they are young and petite in stature.  These same people may find it more difficult to masculinise their voices.  Likewise, tall and middle-aged trans women are likely to find it easier to achieve the same types of voices as tall middle-aged cis women – ones that are naturally lower in pitch.

2.     How much time and energy do you have and are you willing to dedicate to voice work?  We all must balance the demands of everyday life.  We have jobs, families, and social demands on our time and energy.  It’s hard to be available for everyone and everything whilst carving out time for your own interests, like fitness, socialising and yes, voice work.  You must ask yourself how much you are willing prioritise voice work over all the other demands?  

3.     Do you have financial constraints that reduce what money you can invest in voice work?  Can you afford sessions with voice specialist SLTs?  To purchase Voice Apps and Textbooks?   Will you choose to prioritise budgeting for these investments over other discretionary expenses?

Intangible factors are more psychological in nature.  Your personality will have a part to play in how these factors support or inhibit your voice change.  

 1.     Fear.  Fear manifests in many ways.  It can keep you from pushing your vocal boundaries, thus inhibiting growth.  It can prohibit you from speaking to others and revealing your new, improved voice.  It can even keep you from ever beginning the exploration of voice change for fear of failure in achieving that to which you aspire.  How each individual deals with fear is a major factor in determining what’s possible.  One can overcome fear with support, safe spaces and emotional detachment.

2.     Failure.  Probably the most influential factor on determining possibilities is how a person copes with failure and setbacks.  The path to voice change is fraught with opportunities for failure.  For example, it is extremely challenging to generalise skills that are acquired within therapy sessions to life outside the safe space of the therapy room.  As it is not typically an instant change to “a perfect voice”, but a gradual one, most people experience reactions from strangers that reveal surprise or confusion when their voice is not as expected. At this point, the choice is to either take this setback in stride and continue to work on the voice or to give up.  One can overcome failure with resolve, resilience and acceptance.

3.     Frustration.  Failures and setbacks, lack of encouragement and support from family and friends, fatigue and frustration all lead to feelings of discouragement.  Again, the choice to carry on with the process or to give up is yours.  The first reveals more possibilities; the latter buries them.  One can overcome frustration with mindfulness, trying a different approach or taking a break.

In my experience, what is possible is less constrained by what a person has than by what they invest.